eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.