he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
