I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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