Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize