I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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