I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize
