I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I am available for nakedness
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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