We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
we're chasing vodka with high fives
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
