I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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