I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
