He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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