I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
