1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I just gargled with NyQuil
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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