Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
i think i just lost a toe
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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