im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
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