Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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