DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
