dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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