2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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