im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
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