He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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