can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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