Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
