You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
