Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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