Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
