I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
