Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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