I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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