drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
only if we run a train.
done.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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