Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I cannot find my penis.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??