Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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