watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
