What did we do last night that was yellow?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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