My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
