Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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