i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
