i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
How does one acquire holy water?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I have post one night stand depression
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
