Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
