West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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