I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
