Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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