operation have a gay friend backfired
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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