You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize