Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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