i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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