I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
