Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
