WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
