you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize