Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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